Annabeth Chase's List of Stupid Ideas from Percy
by tediousAffections
Summary: The actual title was too long. :/ Basicly just a collection of Annabeth's accounts of Percy's stupid ideas, plots, etc. Rating subject to change.


**Hey everyone! I have returned! **

**Okay, I know my last Percy Jackson fanfic totally failed, but I intend to complete this one! **

**So a friend and I were bored out of our minds in study hall and she suggested I write about an ice cream fight between characters from three different books. Well** **I had issues getting it to flow so I just went with one book's characters. Thus this story was born!**

**If any of you have any suggestions for Percy's stupid plans, leave it in a review and I'll consider writing it! I can't guarantee I'll use everyone's ideas but those whose I use will receive full recognition in that chapter. :D**

**Now please enjoy reading about the Greek and Roman Ice Cream War!**

_**~BitterGlitter, previously xPinkSunshinex**_

* * *

><p>March 21st, 2012<p>

Hello and welcome to Annabeth Chase's "List of Stupid, Idiotic, Horrible Ideas from Seaweed Brain." Yeah, the title needs some work. I can fix that later.

Anyway, after being caught up in _way_ too many of Percy's insane schemes, plots and the like, I decided to appeal to the general demigod public by sharing some of the ridiculous things Percy has decided to do.

After consulting a few of the campers on which idea should start off this fine novel, (as that is what I plan on it amounting to) I decided to start with the ever famous "Greek and Roman Ice Cream War."

_Grr, why didn't I think to bring a hair tie or something? Oh, that's right, I didn't exactly plan to have frozen dairy products launched at my head when I got ready this morning,_ I thought to myself as I crouched behind an overturned table, trying to avoid the banana split Hazel had just thrown at me. Percy was sitting a few feet away, about to throw a hot fudge sundae at someone.

"Who started this anyway?" someone behind me whined. I turned to see a couple of Aphrodite campers hiding behind a booth, trying to avoid the ice cream that was currently sailing through the hair.

"The Stolls, who else?" I said, ducking before throwing a butterscotch sundae across the room, hitting Jason square in the face.

"Of course…"

"Isn't it always them?"

"Admit it, this is awesome!" Percy exclaimed, grabbing a scoop of ice cream and throwing it, not bothering to aim or anything. It flew through the air, far over the Roman lines, before splattering on the wall.

"Great throw Seaweed Brain," I deadpanned, chucking a waffle cone at the Romans before being hit by about a dozen cherries.

It was absolute chaos. And it started off as any normal day would…

"Come on Annabeth, what could it hurt? It's the middle of summer and it's, like, 100 degrees outside!" Percy whined, stomping his foot like a three year-old.

"No Percy, if you want to get ice cream, then you can ask Chiron yourself," I said, turning away from him as I attempted to read my book.

"But Chiron listens to you! Please Annabeth, please!"

"No Percy, I am not asking him for you!"

"Asking who what now?"

"Annabeth won't ask Chiron if we can go get ice cream! Real ice cream, not the magic kind we get here," Percy to Travis Stoll, who had recently acquired the habit of dropping in on peoples' conversations at the worst possible time.

"What's so important about Annabeth asking?" Travis asked.

"Thank you, Travis," I said, grinning as Percy struggled to come up with an answer.

"Why can't we just leave? It's not like anything's going to attack us in an ice cream shop!" the son of Hermes added, revealing a shiny set of keys. "We'll be there and back before Chiron can even notice!"

"Alright! Let's go!" Percy said excitedly, snatching the keys from Travis.

"Hey Conner, we're going to go get some ice cream, you coming?" Travis called to his brother.

That was the absolute, completely wrong thing to say.

Imagine a van full of teenagers going for ice cream. Now imagine a van full of hyperactive teenagers going for ice cream. Now give them all the strongest stimulant you can think of and you have our ride into town.

"And how exactly is Chiron going to miss…" I stopped to count how many people were in the vehicle, "17 missing campers?" I finished, glaring at Percy.

"Just trust us Annabeth, we'll be there and back before Chiron can even notice one of us missing," Percy said, grinning stupidly. I shook my head, not convinced at all. And the worst part was that I'd probably be held responsible.

The ice cream parlor was in the middle of New York City, about an hour drive. By the time we got there, all of the demigods were about ready to explode from excitement. You'd think they had better things to care about than frozen dairy.

"I'm telling you guys, this is the best place in all of New York. They are amazing, the—hey, is that Jason? What are they doing in New York?" Percy asked as we walked in. Sure enough, the son of Zeus—er, sorry, Jupiter, gosh that is confusing sometimes—was standing with at least 15 other teenagers in line. Among them were Hazel, Frank and Reyna and several others from Camp Jupiter.

"Hey, it's Percy!" one of the Romans said, pointing to our group. Jason and Reyna looked over, Jason looking almost amused and Reyna looking like she'd rather run herself through with a spear than have to deal with the son of Poseidon, a feeling I was currently having myself.

It was all downhill from there…

"Come on Annabeth, get into it! The Apollo campers can't do _everything_ you know!" Percy yelled, dodging a lump of strawberry ice cream headed straight for his face. It hit an unsuspecting daughter of Aphrodite, who yelped and sent a murderous glare at the Romans before jumping into the fight. Even the ones who normally sat out were into this, now why couldn't they be this way during capture the flag? That had purpose!

"I'm doing the best I can, you know I work best close range!" I said, resisting the urge to pelt Seaweed Brain with ice cream to see how he liked it. He had miraculously escaped unscathed so far. "How are you not covered in ice cream right now?"

"Ice cream has water in it, so I cheated a little," Percy said, smirking. I sighed, wiping some fudge off my face and smearing on his sleeve before grabbing some more ammunition.

"Percy, Hazel says she'd like to call a ceasefire, the Romans are getting tired of this." Nico appeared out of nowhere, startling Percy and causing him to fall backwards into a puddle of semi-melted ice cream.

"Never!" Percy screamed, fighting with a renewed vigor.

"Oh well Nico, you tried," I said as Nico dodged a banana that was covered in strawberry syrup.

Or I hoped it was strawberry syrup…

"How did this even start?" Nico yelled over the sound of 30 screaming demigods.

"I wish I knew!"

At first the demigods were at least civil. Nico went to talk with his sister, Clarisse wanted to compare battle strategy with the children of Mars and Percy went to talk to Jason and Reyna, leaving me with the rest of the Greek campers who were currently glaring at the Romans with a deep hatred, which I deemed ridiculous.

"We can get ice cream soon?" Tyson asked me.

"Yeah Tyson, we can get ice cream soon," I said, sighing. _At least I hope,_ I added mentally.

The whole room fell deadly silent in an instant right before the sickening splatter of ice cream filled my eardrums. We all looked over to see Travis and Conner trying not to laugh while one of the Roman campers fumed, melting chocolate ice cream dripping off the ends of his hair.

"Food fight!" the two sons of Hermes declared as one before grabbing an ice cream cone apiece and running for cover.

"Annabeth… Annabeth!" I jumped as Seaweed Brain waved a hand in front of my face.

"What, Percy?" I snapped, a bit harsher than intended.

"Oh, nothing, you've just been sitting there zoned out," Percy said, scooping a sickening mixture of smashed fruit, sugary syrups and sticky ice cream off the floor and lobbing it over the edge of the table. I took a chance to look around the restaurant, noticing that it was completely deserted except for the demigods and a few employees who were too scared to do anything.

A loud cry came from the other end of the ice cream parlor. I turned just in time to see Travis and Connor, pulling a bowl full of who knows what back in a makeshift slingshot. When they let it go, the huge glob of melting everything flew through the air. I couldn't watch to see who it hit, but I had a pretty good idea from Reyna's scream. I peeked over the table to see her radiating pure hatred, at least fifteen different flavors of ice cream dripping down her head and a few stray cherries hanging by their stems in her hair.

"Oh, take that Greek wannabes!" Travis yelled, giving Conner a high five and diving underneath a table.

"Greek wannabes! Romans, attack!" Reyna screamed, shaking her head to dislodge the cherries. As one, the entire group of Roman demigods launched a little bit of everything in the store at us. I could see some of them grabbing canisters of toppings from behind the counter and ripping the lids off.

"Oh dear gods, help us all…" I muttered as a barrage of peanuts and M&M's flew over my head and pelted the campers behind me.

"We got this Annabeth," Conner said as he and Travis hurried to reload their slingshot with anything they could find.

"_What is going on in here!_" We all stopped what we were doing as a very official looking man walked out of an office into the room. He had a nametag pinned to his shirt that read _Richard Werner—Manager_.

The Stolls chose that moment to launch. The mixture flew straight for the manager, getting all over his perfect work uniform.

"Run!" the two brothers screamed, bolting for the nearest exit. Percy grabbed my wrist and pulled me to my feet before running for the front door. I followed him outside and leapt into the back of the van, followed by the rest of the campers.

"Well, we're going to have a heck of a time explaining to Chiron why we're all coated in ice cream," I said simply, wiping some of the melted dairy treat off my face.

"Admit it, you had a great time," Percy said, elbowing me in the side.

"I'll never admit anything to you, Seaweed Brain," I replied, smearing the ice cream on his face.

"That's it, I say we have another round this Friday instead of capture the flag. Anyone else in?" Percy asked, grinning broadly.

"_NO!_"


End file.
